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​The Ultimate Cornhole Workout

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The Ultimate Cornhole Workout

Don’t lie to me, the most exercise you’ve gotten all week is when you threw that tantrum at the guy turning left on green and holding up the line. Don’t worry, I’m hear to hook you up with the perfect cornhole workout to get you on track and improve your cornhole game. If I know anything about cornhole, its that it takes literally no effort and excessive alcohol consumption is basically expected so this program is going to reflect this perfectly. Note that this program is also great for those playing connect four but not suitable for tumble tower players.

The key to a good cornhole workout is starting with a good stretch: I like to call this part “the deep cornhole stretch”. Since we both know you’re not going to stretch anyway, lets skip it.

Next, lets focus on the shoulders. Throwing a toss bag is almost all shoulders so we need to take this part seriously. The key to a good shoulder workout is only doing shrugs. Shrugs allow to use big weights without actually lifting any weight. After you half rep a couple sets of shrugs lets move on to the next step.

Everyone’s favorite is up next: legs. Your cornhole game requires a solid stance and powerful base. I already know about your bullshit “knee injury” so we’ll skip squats and go right to the leg press. When doing the leg press, it’s important to use your arms as much as possible just as you would while playing cornhole. Load up that machine with as much weight as you feel like moving, make sure everyone’s watching, and press out a couple half-reps. Remember that if you can’t text while pressing, then your doing too much weight. Be sure to occupy the machine for the length of a cornhole game to get your timing down: about 30 minutes should be sufficient.

It’s core time! Cornhole requires solid posture and a powerful core. When throwing the toss bag, you’ll need a strong core to get the release just right. I’ve put together the perfect cornhole ab routine. How many ab wheel roll outs can you do? None. When was the last time you did a sit-up? 20 years ago. Were you even planning to work abs? No you weren’t. At this point, your best bet is to take a nap on a 6 pack of lites and pretend the indentions are abs.

The last step of the cornhole workout is cardio. Drink that 6 pack and let’s take a run. To be clear, I mean jog to the mailbox and realize your no longer interested.

Now that your chiseled and ripped, lets play some cornhole. Break out the custom toss bags, fill up those cup-holder equipped legs, and start playing cornhole on your precision printed cornhole boards. Your cornhole game will surely be better and more powerful than ever with this carefully designed custom cornhole workout.

Quick disclaimer: this is a joke! Don’t do this work out, it’s unsafe. Consult your physician, don’t be a dumb-ass, blah blah, you get the idea!

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